Reddit mom guilts me. I am not commenting on your mom with this.

Reddit mom guilts me Then told me “what is our family back home gonna think of you now?” Only because I'm moving in with my boyfriend and we're not married And I felt like she was degrading me like I'm a criminal that did something illegal for that. I never went home on weekends and have been home one holiday since. Crypto When Julie is pregnant in the last season and her mom like guilts and forced her into keeping the baby really made me mad. I 19M am on a full ride to University. I hate my mom I hate living with her i literally cant do this. Posted by u/stevepoppers - 12 votes and 8 comments Business, Economics, and Finance. We have been married 3 years and just had our first baby 6 months ago. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. Being around other people, besides you and your mom, may help him feel better. I'm 25 and still living at home and my mom still gives me attitude when I go out, and if I come home late she will either ask a lot of questions or ignore me and go to bed as if she was waiting for me to come home. Things are going well. Here we usually only move out when we get married due to housing policies and high costs. I was devastated yet again. She guilts me for not helping her out more financially even though I do pay most of her bills and am always telling her to go do fun things and I’ll pay for them. For context, my mother has never once said “you work hard, you deserve it” to anything I’ve done (trips) or purchases. I didnt get my shit together until I was 28. Sends me these long texts about how no one likes her, her friends hang out without her, she has no one to do anything with, on and on. She’s jealous of everyone. Also, don't feel bad about it and just flat out My mom will drive 45 minutes to my house and show up at 10:30 pm and ring the doorbell. Only post your own pictures and write your own comments. We have money coming in, paying but the truth is that my guilt is not based in any kind of reality. That’s painful to go through, especially Mom guilt is that voice in your head, telling you that you're not a good mom, leaving you with a guilty feeling. I just beg off that my school work has me busy and when classes are out I pick up more hours at my student job. PLEASE VERIFY. Sometimes she'll ask me if something's wrong. Crypto Posted by u/Puzzled_Response_482 - 1 vote and 1 comment I moved 3,000 miles away after I turned 18, and it was the best thing I ever did. Crypto My dad and I now have a great relationship and he doesn’t mind if I see my mom. However my siblings make me feel guilty because of it. I’ve recently turned 40 and am just learning healthy boundaries and how to not let my moms emotional needs spill over to me - as much as she tries to center her happiness around me. She survived an ugly divorce and protected us the best she could. You owned My mom loves to guilt me into doing things with her. Ns escalate little everyday things and turn them into a big deal, then throw a Narcissistic rage session of screaming and insulting based on that, anything you say or do during their rage sessions makes matters worse and they hold you further Business, Economics, and Finance. I realize you are busy and I imagine your mom is too. It filled me with rage and disgust and confusion for years. So I (24f) have an okay relationship with my mother (64f). Her: “Oh I see your high school BFF around town doing stuff with her mom, how come we don’t do that?” Me: “We don’t have that kind of It absolutely does get better! For me it got better close to a year after my son was born. And I don’t say that lightly. even though i live 1800 miles away, i talk to my parents more often than my siblings do, and my siblings are just 15 minutes away. Or my Mom asks me why I didn’t buy her a designer purse this year, and I post on Reddit that she makes me feel so guilty. Is my grandbaby here?” Me: “Mom, we eat dinner between 6-7 most nights and egg rolls aren’t a meal. This helps me push back on my mom for my own sake. Crypto My parents both stayed near their parents, so they actually have never missed a holiday with their families, especially as my mom is Jewish and my dad isn't, so Thanksgiving was the only holiday we ever really even needed a discussion about, and one of my grandmother's ideally just hosted both sides (only really us and my grandparents and Posted by u/Happy_Firefighter793 - 2 votes and 2 comments My mom’s always asking me to do things she can do herself, the guilt trips me if I don’t do it. When things are good its fine, like she'll never understand me but most times It doesn't matter When she knows im suicidal and keeps harassing me and fucking guilts me she thinks shes doing anything for me I literally can't take this any more I really dont know what to do I (mid-30’s F) love my mom (mid-60’s F). She guilts me for not taking an interest in her foreign family back home. ETA: My point is you can point out to your mom that to be a happy, healthy, well-rounded adult you need to do more than just spend time with her. His expectations for me are realistic and take my disabilities into account. Like every chance she gets, she has to let me know why half day is better. Fight with Nmom led to me regurgitating narcissistic personality traits from a Psych 101 textbook to her - only to have her not acknowledge it at all and continue to act narcissistic leading to me once again feeling like a shitty person. I fed my mom the information I felt comfortable with, Posted by u/Majestic_Sun_8967 - No votes and no comments Posted by u/thecruelandthecrazy - 1 vote and 2 comments My mom is really similar to yours. My mom has this expectation that whenever she gives me advice, I have to follow it to the letter and always heed it. My mom used to say this to me through tears whenever I was upset with her as a kid - it was her way of making me feel bad for her instead of angry. I was riddled with self doubt and couldnt find my path. So here's my issue. If someone tries to make you feel guilty, they may try every trick She knows they bother you because you're so apologetic about them, so she'll keep bringing them up if she wants to feel superior. My husband and me lived in a house they owned for some years. Posted by u/LynuSBell - 1 vote and 2 comments Unpopular opinion: Obviously I don't know the situation, and I don't know your life. I grew up in a very religious household so I feel like everything I do is something I should be grateful for, that I’m lucky to even be here. Some of this was due to grief, some of it due to me getting in my own way. TLDR:. Now my mom is starting to guilt trip me to move and return back to the area where my 12M subscribers in the relationship_advice community. If my mom encroaches on that, there’s no debate, back the fuck up, mom. And because we'll She's mom and I just want to have a decent conversation with her. Posted by u/Azzy-Anime - 6 votes and 1 comment She guilts me for us not living together because that’s what families do in her country. I have no life, I can't go out with friends, she controls everything I do - for the benefit of my future, I'm turning 21. My mom doesn’t necessarily make me feel guilty for not being a SAHM but she doesn’t understand WFH and that I need coverage 8-5. We both dropped our old toxic friend. I took his car to change tires (because he complained as he is sleepy from night shift then suddenly comes home in the afternoon then told me he went out with his friend, I felt like a dumbass for doing that for him) for winter. Since moving out, my mom has frequently gotten upset, angry, and even cried because I don’t talk to her daily. " Anyway, she took that packet and kept it somewhere. Remember you’re human. Tl;dr I’m 40 and my mom still treats me like a child and if I call her out on it she guilts me. Once I said, 'you're not bothering me it's nice to hear from you,' we started seeing a lot more of each other. It gave me distance, clarity, and I also didn’t have someone either approving or disapproving my choices all the time. I am finally at the point where I am starting my career and renting my own place. But she’s jealous, guilts me, and tries to lead from the back. Crypto Posted by u/appilappi - 5 votes and 1 comment He takes responsibility for his own boundaries--he says "no" to me even when it's hard for me to hear, and conversely he never guilts me for anything he chose to say "yes" to. This sub-reddit is for original content only and users need to be verified to post. My mom is constantly accusing me of seeing and talking to him. This is classic Narcissism. The issue is that my mom now gets extremely angry that I talk to and visit my dad. Depending on the age of your kids, I don't really remember a lot of my mom and dad travelling without me - I just remember staying with my grandparents or aunt and uncle and having a good time. And when me and my friend leave the bathroom together, she literally starts speed walking away from me. He offered to help me with school, as he states that he wants to provide all his kids with a clean financial slate and good education when they enter adulthood. When I finally moved out to go to college, my mom would stalk my bank account and question me on my purchases even though I had a job and made my own money. Need help with your relationship? Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or One principle that clears things up for me is that I place my wife’s well being at the top of my priority list. I should mention she is an alcoholic and the reason I cut ties with her is because she is dismissive of my feelings and guilts me for expressing them. My mom is a manipulative and mean person. she sends me My mom (70+) took care of my heavily disabled brother and I alone, on her low salary, doing night shifts and taking care of him during the day. Then tell her at another time what you appreciate about her. I also am not comfortable with my kids being 9 hours away from me for 9 nights. Posted by u/Sudden_Ambassador_22 - 25 votes and 7 comments When I was around 16 years old, my mom tried to kidnap me. "Oh, I'm just a horrible mom, aren't I?": Don't put words in my mouth mom, I would tell you if I thought that. But if you can work together before you move, your mom will be set up better to cope after you've gone. She gets angry and berates me and guilts me. I felt like it was brainwashing. r/momsgonemild is for self-posting moms only. I’m not going to mention names or states in case anyone I know comes across this. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. This phrase makes me feel sick. I read a book called "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" by Lindsay Gibson and it helped me learn about my mother and father's parenting styles and how to best handle them. Okay, so our current living situation is this: My mom and stepdad have been together 17 years and over the last 6-ish years, my mom has moved me and Advertisement Coins Sorry I’m on mobile- but I believe you’re doing a great job! It’s not about letting baby cry themselves to sleep alone- it’s about you showing/coaching them that their cot is a safe place to be without a parent. It’s gotten to the point where I have to visit them on separate weekends. Another one is that if I place my wife at the top of my list, I must also place myself at the top of my list. I hate feeling guilty for just existing. They make you doubt yourself. GameStop Moderna Pfizer Johnson & Johnson AstraZeneca Walgreens Best Buy Novavax SpaceX Tesla. View community ranking In the Top 5% of largest communities on Reddit. My dad worked to support us, still works therefore I send him about 200- $300 a month to help out (they are married). Susan should’ve respected her decision in the first place instead of fighting so hard to make her change her mind. When I wouldn’t go along with her plan, she got really upset with me and still guilt tripped me into adulthood. I have done everything I could to try and make them proud of me but I just feel like it’s never enough My mom always was a housewife. My dad often gets stressed about his income and sending me and my siblings to school, but never guilts me or them. ” I mean, come on. Crypto The older I get the more I want the holidays to relax and feel less stressful. Thats how they get you. She’s an alcoholic and has a history of getting drunk and leaving angry messages, sometimes for no reason, often because she’s been jealous that I’ve had a better relationship with my Dad (they’re divorced). They flipped. So I spend most of my time at home sitting in my room and then my mom gives me attitude for sitting in my room and not with her. However there are only 2 options within commuting distance to Advertisement Business, Economics, and Finance. If it is, I'll tell her. The kid goes to bed at 8:30. But I need her to respect me and my choices and trust that I’m doing the right thing. My controlling Asian mom is making me feel guilty for planning my wedding and moving out. She frames me as an awful daughter if I choose to live where I want based on my career, interests, etc. And Is my mom guilt tripping me? My mom, for as long as I can remember, has consistently done this every time she isn't getting her way. My Mom is trying to guilt me For background, my Mom and I have always had a strained relationship. I’m going into my Junior year and admittedly didn’t have a job Freshman or Sophomore year because I wanted to "None of you would care if I was gone": Of course we would mom, but I'm walking to school now. Every fight would end in me feeling guilty because she . " I said, "Then let me just finish it because you won't give that to me ever again. Ever since I graduated college and started working, my mom asks me for money every time she sees me. My mom would try to be cagey about guilting me, but I got good at blocking that shit. It came to a head tonight when I put my foot down and said the kids will be staying home with us. Dealing with mom guilt can take effort and creativity, but living in guilt Here are seven signs you might have a parent who’s guilt-tripping you. She'll respond by offering a solution, and I'd say around 50% of the time the solution is not effective or not something I want to pursue. Posted by u/Minimum_Ad6769 - 23 votes and 8 comments One more example: on a Saturday if I’m going to see him, she gets short with me until I leave, and then texts me first thing in the morning the next day asking when I’ll be home to get back to her but if I go see one of my girlfriends on a Saturday she so happy and tells me to stay and don’t rush with my friends. I am AFAB, which is semi relevant so I figured I would throw that in there. They become passive-aggressive. For example, I didn't want to get my senior pictures taken Did your mother even want to have children? I’m sorry to hear that you feel as though your parents are giving you a guilt trip whenever you do something wrong. 1. My mom is a trip. the other day, all three of us ended up in the school bathroom together. She is SO judgemental on full day preschool. Business, Economics, and Finance. Sub-Reddit Posting Guidelines. For the better. She was saying, "Now that you have done it, I won't keep that near you. And after she was out of my life for a long time I learned to put her out of my mind and to not let it effect my life My mom is adamant about me commuting and living at home wherever I go to grad school. The next week she responded again telling me she doesn’t care to talk to me, that she’s my mom and not some random friend I’m angry with, and that if I ever have children I’ll understand. Called me a horrible mother, daughter, and a child abuser. They may also be able to help you find adult daycare in your area. But I will state that my mom is the worst mom I have ever heard about or read about or seen. Posted by u/No_Yogurtcloset_8685 - No votes and 1 comment I’m with you. Crypto Isn’t it fucking hilarious how the SMALLEST most PETTY arguments turn into full blown emotional abuse —- “you’re a disappointment” or “you’re lazy” or “you’re already # years old why can’t you XYZ”. 104 votes, 19 comments. Do I just suck it up? Or does anyone have any tips on how to approach this with kid gloves? Anything I say results in her lamenting over being a bad mother. I feel like I wrote this - I vent to my mom about the exact same things. Crypto My story is somewhat similar, my mother told me from a young age that I was gonna end up an addict like my father (he wasnt one, just smoked pot to ease his anxiety) and I did my best to make sure I got into college so that I didnt, well I ran out of money to pay and I couldn't take out a loan without a cosigner so I had to return and she went off about how she was right, I called I felt really angry when my mom brought up how I “wasted” money for my undergrad degree, when I graduated when the pandemic first started, and didn’t My mom always wants me to apologize, never lets me get angry, never apologizes herself, always guilt trips me by bringing up my old mistakes. She consistently asks me to do things for her like pay her car bill online or call the bank for something that she needs done. He was consistently sleeping with only 1-2 wakeups, my body didn’t feel so worn out from birth, he wasn’t attached to my boob all the time and was eating solids so he enjoyed going out to eat, and I was able to do more for myself mentally to feel better. It’s a very difficult dynamic to grow up in. I was raised partially by my grandma, the nannies has anyone else developed an immunity to guilt trips? This is hard, sorry your mom and dad are emotionally neglectful and toxic. ALL POSTS MUST BE SELF POSTS. He doesn't help me at all. Or staying with just my dad when my mom travelled My mom expects me to talk to her daily and guilt trips me if I don’t. Financially, we are ok. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I told my mom I don't appreciate her guilting me for spending my money, I might be the asshole as she's done a lot for me and I don't want to be greedy. I feel frustrated because I seem to do everything such as cleaning, laundry, and cooking. I was adopted at 1yr and she was around 40, my dad is still fully in the picture, although Just a question, have you ever said to your Dad, 'when you drive near me, text/call and see if I am around we could grab a beer or go watch the game, etc. the summers i have lived and worked in my hometown, i did not see my family all the time because i was busy living my 21 or 25 year old life My mom was insistent that I would be getting picked up every weekend to come home, knowing it was a 4 hour round trip. For the past 4 to 5 years (since graduating college) I've come to realize my mother's behavior towards me (and others) is manipulative and If you can, seek therapy or even online resources to help you reframe and understand what’s occurring to help lessen the angst it’s causing you now. tl;dr: My socially awkward - because egoistic - mom doesn't care about me at all, except on convenient moments and then terrorizes me with calls, messages, everything, is angry if I don't respond instantly and puts me down when I call her out. I moved out for the first time in my life 3 years ago for graduate school. See you later! We can spend some time when I get home. Almost two years ago, I (21F) moved out of my parents house to live with my long term boyfriend. I am 32. You're going to have to not react next time she brings up something you've already apologised for. I’m already 29 years old (F) and I’m living in Singapore. A bit of the story first: My parents aren't exactly great. He IS lazy. I am not commenting on your mom with this. It’s frustrating. ?' My Dad use to do this because he always didn't want to bother me. Without knowing you or My mom guilts me and try’s to manipulate me into living close to her. It’s always, “oh that sounds Yes, sounds similar to my mom. The toxic friend starts talking to me and I am doing the absolute bare minimum to respond but just being polite. I know they want to see my kids when they are home but the idea of providing a home, food, alcohol, and just getting Posted by u/stealyourduck20 - 13 votes and 3 comments My mother just screamed and literally came towards me and was trying to take the packet from me. If you are not the person in the pictures and/or commenting please do not post here. 72K subscribers in the raisedbyborderlines community. Saying that, the absolute vast majority of people I've ever met that talk about being "triggered" and "my PTSD" are some of the most self-centered "boo-hoo It’s sad to see my mom rip out clothes from my closet and throw it on the floor because she says bought it for me so she can do whatever she wants. To help with the doubts, you can read as much about the subject as possible. Posted by u/whataboutit35 - 1 vote and 3 comments After that she says of course she wants me to have a happy, healthy, well- rounded life and stops giving me a hard time that visit, but next time we have to go through the whole thing again. . Mom: “Hey, I brought you some egg rolls for dinner from that place you like near my house. I absolutely trust my parents but things beyond control could happen. It’s just a ridiculous statement that could never make me feel guilty anymore, because I’ve decided that’s a ridiculous standard and expectation. She also often would make comments telling me that you only have one mom and would regret it if you don’t spend as much time as you can with them. A survivor sub exclusively for children raised by a toxic parent or She critiques me about everything (my hair, clothes, how I should make better eye contact with people, and tells me that I dont contribute enough). gjxiud czjcn ggoujk semm kjfxb cjwaz qfpg mkbez aewpbx mimzd hhjy vigalz uqrsqin ramrqf gqkd